Tanking for Dummies


Stating the obvious: There is still a tank shortage
December 14, 2009, 1:20 pm
Filed under: Analysis | Tags: , ,

Ah.  New LFG Tool.  Your praises have been sung by many.  I have, myself seen the beauty of it’s well designed features.  The obvious rewards, both potential and actualized.  I could go on…

But I am a tank.

See, it has been brought to my attention that there are certain discrepancies in demographics, which, shall we say, make the LFG tool less than useful for certain other group roles.  Like, say, everyone else.

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The Plan for Looting Icecrown Citadel (Thus far)
December 11, 2009, 12:01 am
Filed under: Analysis, Gear, Raiding | Tags: , , , , ,

First off, I’m not going to go into the 5-man lootables.  In case you missed it, Kadomi did a super job covering that stuff already.

What I am going to do is talk about Raid and Emblem loot (or at least what we know about it thus far).  I’m not going to worry about “Heroic” versions of these items either. You’re not going to see them until, well, I guess February or March anyway.

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Dear Greatfather Winter,
December 9, 2009, 12:01 am
Filed under: Humor | Tags:

You are real!  You are real!  I told all the other raiders but they didn’t believe me.  They said you were just Thrall all dressed up in a suit.  But I knew better.  Just because he can be in multiple places at once doesn’t mean he is the one that brings presents to all the good warriors of the Horde.  I kept the faith!  We sure showed them!

In any case, seeing as you have already made one wish come true, I was hoping, maybe, possibly, you might do another one?  I’ve been really really good!  All the naughty blood elves always poke fun at me with their bad hamburger jokes, but even though I really wanted to I didn’t war stomp even one!  I even volunteered to DPS when we needed it.  I even slaughtered Varian Wrynn this year!  Plus, it’s something so teeny that your phenomenal cosmic powers should be able to totally do it easily.

All I want for winter’s vale is a brand new, shiny, Overlord Varok Saurfang Edition Mechano-Hog with the Arctic Fur seats and Elementium Plated Exhaust Pipe!  I’ve wanted one ever since I came to Northrend, but I’m just a poor little meat-shield that spends all his money on consumables and repair costs for raids.  Since you already gave Joveta a whole patch I’m sure this won’t be too much to ask, will it?  I mean I can understand that your busy this time of year, but you have elves and goblins and stuff to make things like that.  Right?

Oh, and I have attached a picture of a Christmas Cookie for you.  It’s the one that I’ve been saving to give you, and I totally will when you come to Orgrimmar this year.

Very Best Happy Holidays,

Tarsus Grimtotem

PS: Don’t pay attention to what Jov says.  Sausages are delicious.  You should be careful though about the Goblin ones.  Sometimes they explode.



No Update Today (Occasionally There is a Good Reason)
December 7, 2009, 3:16 pm
Filed under: News | Tags:

There is no update today (duh!) because I am starting at a new job.  Huzzah for employment.

New Employee Orientation is not conductive for blog composition.

See you all Wednesday!



Top 10 Things to do While Waiting for Patch 3.3 to go Live
December 4, 2009, 12:01 am
Filed under: Humor, Lists | Tags: , , ,

Does it seem like your life is a roller coaster, going from Tuesday to Tuesday?  Does each fateful week pass for you, leaving only disappointment?  Is there nothing you want more in life than to stop doing ToC and fling yourself bodily into Icecrown?

For you for whom patience is not enough, I give you these helpful suggestions:

10. Review the strategies for taking down long forgotten bosses as part of the Weekly Raid Quests.

9. Bank money to blow on repair bills – the pug demands it.

8. Stockpile consumables, like flasks, potions, and stacks of Glyph of Taunt.

7. Log on to the PTR and do practice runs of the Icecrown Citadel 5-man Dungeons.

6. Watch videos of the boss fights in Icecrown Citadel Raid.

5. Cast another vote for Basic Campfire.

4. Dream up the RP background for your new Worgen or Goblin.

3. Compose a crazy rant to convince the scary lady with knives that we shouldn’t run ToC anymore.

2. Make a sandwich.

1. Get treatment for the pain in your Heroic Strike hand.

And you thought it was just repetitive stress injury.  HA!



I don’t want to run ToC 10 (dammit)
December 2, 2009, 12:01 am
Filed under: Raiding, Rants | Tags: , , , , , ,

In case it hasn’t been said enough on the WoW Blog-o-sphere, I’m going to add to the chorus my own voice and say that I’m not the biggest fan of Trial of the Crusader.  I’ve hinted at this, but for the purpose of this bit of outrage I’m about to produce, it is key to acknowledge this openly.

I thought that I could get away with doing ToC only once a week in the interest of maintaining my gear progression.

I thought that this would be sufficient, seeing as I was also wiping for hours and hours on Trial of the Grand Crusader as well.

I was wrong.

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Preventing “The Claw” – Binding Heroic Strike to Mousewheel
November 30, 2009, 11:57 am
Filed under: Analysis, How To | Tags: , , ,

I make a lot of jokes about Warrior tanks crippling themselves trying to max out their Heroic Strike usage.  In the parlance, I refer to the ravages of carpal tunnel as “The Claw” (pronounced like ‘da crah!’), that feeling after raid like you cannot move your hand because your fingers hurt from jamming that Heroic Strike key for 4 hours.

I can’t help but feel I’ve been a little flippant about this whole thing.  So to make it up to everyone, I’m going to give you all a brief primer on setting up the best temporary solution to give your left hand a break: Bind your Heroic Strike Key to the Mousewheel.

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